After We Collided (2020)

The thing is, even before watching this film, I could tell I was going to hate it.

After We Collided is a sequel to last year’s After which itself was based on Anna Todd’s 2014 novel of the same name, and which was originally published as a Harry Styles-centric fan-fiction on WattPad (a similar path as E.L. James’ Fifty Shades of Grey series).

After follows a young girl, Tessa (Josephine Langford), through her first year of college and her turbulent relationship with Hardin, (Hero Fiennes), a pale, British, green-eyed, troublesome young man who manipulates and uses her, only to win her back at the end of the film. Think a mashup of She’s All That and Cruel Intentions, with less witty dialogue.

After We Collided begins with Hardin narrating their love story — a tale worthy of Greek epics and Shakespeare, according to him — and concluding, not with a happy ending, but with Hardin waking alone, in his car, with Tessa refusing to take his calls. Exactly what he deserves, after his miserable treatment of Tessa during their relationship.

But, of course, through a series of cringe-worthy events (a pretend to-be-still-dating trope), the pair are inevitably reunited in all their toxic glory, despite the arrival of a second love interest in the surprising form of Trevor(Dylan Sprouse), one of her new coworkers at a well-to-do publishing company. This is Sprouse’s return to acting after a long hiatus — unlike his brother Cole, who has long-helmed one of the lead roles in the CW’s Riverdale for the past few years.